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I am feeling an overwhelming sense of relief that Christmas is over. We survived with little fallout. I even didn't mind going back to work today. My work schedule is still very light due to most kids still being off for the holidays, and it is a nice way to ease back into things. I took my Mp3 player to work and finished up a report that was overdue before my kids showed up. Tomorrow I have only one client--bliss!

B and A are leaving town tomorrow to visit B's mom. I am very glad they are going. She is extremely sick, and they need to visit as many times as they can while they can. I will miss them, though. I was hoping to play a board game with A tonight, but he got a better offer from his friends. He already has been invited to a New Year's Eve party.

During the first few weeks after W died, I remember feeling very protective of A and not wanting him to go too far away. Fortunately, I have relaxed since then, and I think we are treating him more or less "normally." I don't want to be too overprotective or too clingy, or too rejecting. I want him to have a normal life as possible. That's what we were able to give W. And even knowing what we know now, I hope we could have still given that to him. My number one priority right now is enabling A to have the best life he can. I know I can't make his life happy; only he can do that. But I can keep myself from introducing sources of unhappiness.

Comments

( 3 comments — Leave a comment )
theodicy
Dec. 28th, 2004 01:33 am (UTC)
It's a pleasure to read about a mom who thinks as clearly and objectively as she can about her kids' lives. I wish I had had that.
lonestarslp
Dec. 28th, 2004 05:57 am (UTC)
That's sweet, thanks! I hope it is as objective in real life as it is in LJ land.
dream_a_highway
Dec. 28th, 2004 07:24 pm (UTC)
wow, we made it through christmas. I almost can't believe it.

I agree with theodicy, it's refreshing to read what you said about your children's lives.
( 3 comments — Leave a comment )