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What is going on?

For the last couple of weeks, I have really been having a rough time. I am not sure why things have been so hard lately. Things have been happening, and perhaps any one of them is not a big deal, but it is possible that all these things together have been weighing on my heart.

The client who didn't like me and left.
The minister that helped us plan W's funeral and was so helpful to us after W's death resigned from our church suddenly due to "violation of ministerial ethics." No one knows why.
The amount of work I need to do on the house because we redid our floors--I feel guilty because I haven't done enough to get things straight.
Working with the AED issues--I have been to several meetings that were good, but that left me very sad because I had to relive the issues.
Care ministry training--has also been good but also emotionally draining.

So tonight I came home and lost it. I have been reliving the day W died a lot recently as well. I guess I am not as far down the path as I thought. Well, I just have to keep walking it.

A big thanks to everyone who has been sending me supportive comments. Somedays I just can't get it together to respond. But all of you are greatly appreciated.

Comments

( 7 comments — Leave a comment )
scienceguru
Apr. 14th, 2005 02:43 am (UTC)
((((((((((((((lonestarslp)))))))))))))))

One of my students was talking about AEDs today before class started. They asked me if we had them on campus and I said, no, but I know in Plano they do. He mentioned that Plano Medical Center had donated a bunch of them to the district. I told him about you and W, and he said 'maybe our school needs to work harder to get some on campus.'
lonestarslp
Apr. 14th, 2005 02:47 am (UTC)
Dang, if you all ever need anybody to speak or send letters, let me know. I am hoping to reach out to other communities like Allen once I get my act together.
scienceguru
Apr. 14th, 2005 03:32 am (UTC)
That would be awesome. Our student reporters actually did a story yesterday on our morning newscast about AEDs and why we don't have any on campus.
gurdonark
Apr. 14th, 2005 04:04 am (UTC)
Sorry things have gone rough with you. You oughta come over to my office sometime soon and we'll talk cool papers and new plans.
geddiegirl
Apr. 14th, 2005 12:46 pm (UTC)
Father God, Surround her with your peace, comfort and knowledge that W is with you. Send a hedge of protection around her heart and her home. Keep people surrounding her that are there to help complete the things that drain her. We praise you for your many blessings in our lives, we don't understand why W is with you and sometimes we are angry, but truly, we know deep in our hearts that you work all things for good as we are obedient to you and we love you. I ask that supernatural favor and healing of her hurts continue to work miracles, that the things she is supporting to keep needless things from happening continue to flourish, that she find meaning in her work, her love of her family, and you. Thank you Father for such a bright person in lonestarship, for a mind that has so many directions to bring light to others, for her sharing, for her love of service, for her ability to lead even when she doesn't want the position. We love you and thank you for her and her family. Amen
mizdandylynn
Apr. 23rd, 2005 02:02 pm (UTC)
There are always a few recycles...I know just when I think I am past something... it seems to pop back up.. but fortunately.. for me .. and I think for you..it is fewer and more far between.. I continue to think of you and pray for you... *hugs*
geddiegirl
Apr. 23rd, 2005 07:13 pm (UTC)
Thank you God for people who care enough to continue to fight for others needs even when they have been disappointed in their own , thank you for giving and continuing to bless them.
( 7 comments — Leave a comment )